Untitled

For my first piece on this blog I'll be showing you all an old piece I wrote.

It's not so much of a story, but a monologue, so pardon the "unconventional" typing.

It may not sound that great, but monologues aren't meant to simply be read, they are performed.

It's a piece that means a lot to me personally. It just started out as a rant, a general rant against the world and was originally found on my own personal blog.

It ended up being a rather eloquent (I think) anti-bullying piece despite my rather volatile emotional state at the time. I've edited it since to make it more of a monologue and since then a friend of mine I showed it to described it as emotionally charged and raw.

Yeah that's what I suppose I am. Enjoy.

Monologue (Untitled):

I hate this world. I hate the way people hate each other. I hate the killing. I hate the sarcastic insults. I hate the way people are left out. Left to rot. I hate the way we hate each other because people are different. Ever met one of those "different" people? Those who never fit in. Ever not talk to one of them? Ever called them names? Ever turn away when they turned to you, for anything. They see. They see everything. They may be different. But they see. They see the look in your eyes when they talk to you. They see your disgust and disdain. They see your contempt, for who they are as a person. It just takes one to plant that seed of doubt. Then all of a sudden, there are two. Then five. Ten. Faces. Taunting, mocking faces. They lose all sense of self. Hope.

They know and feel that they are unwanted. So what if you didn't really do that. So what.SO WHAT. If you've seen it happen, and let it happen. You caused it too. For all it takes, is that ray of light, to chase away all the shadows. But, it never comes. They falter, stumble in the realization, that not one person is willing to shine that light for them. To guide them out of the darkness.

Many fall. Some never get up. Most cry out. To their parents, to God, to anyone. To come save them. Most hear nothing but deafening silence. But it doesn’t last.

It never does.

They start to hear. Voices, from the deep, depths of the earth. From the wretched parts of the soul. They bat away those voices. For they call, for their minds, their hearts, their lives.

But not all manage to do so.

For the rest, they endure the voices. The faces. The suffocating darkness. And slowly waste away. Every day the pull gets stronger, the voices grow louder. The walk in the dark stretches longer and longer. There is no end point. No end to their torment. Can you truly say you aren’t one of the guilty ones? I felt the darkness. I stood at the brink of sanity. And nearly, nearly let myself fall.

I was one of the lucky ones, for I stumbled upon a mirror. That let me see the light within me. That was good enough as I made my way out of the dark. Yet upon leaving it, I never looked back for the others I knew there. I kept my own light from them. Him.

I swear I'll never do that again. Will you?

I still face the dark today. But it’s different now. I've seen this place in the light before. The shadows no longer have a sway on me as the light within me quashes those fears.

It only takes one.

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There was a refrain that I put within my original post that I think though it didn't make it through the editing I need to include here.

Mich, you said you felt bad for not doing anything to help me back then. Don't. Cause you did. More than anyone else.